Once your child hits puberty and has some independence and a few dollars to spend, you cannot control what he or she eats. High fat foods are cheap and available everywhere. With adolescents, adopting the role of the “food police” typically provides another avenue for confrontation or rebellion. However, you can do quite a few things to encourage your child to eat well.

If you follow the suggestions listed below, you will make it much easier for your child to eat healthfully and lose weight:

General Attitude

• Be positive. Convey to your child that even though it is very difficult to eat healthy foods consistently, you believe he or she can do it. This attitude will boost your child’s self-confidence while acknowledging the difficulties. Avoid negative comments, criticism, and coercion. These are unhelpful and demoralizing, and will create resentment – not something that works well in teenagers. Resentment could easily cause your child to eat more – not less – and thwart the likelihood of long-term success.
• Be reinforcing. Acknowledge your child’s accomplishments. Compliments, attention, encouragement, and tangible reinforcement (like small gifts, but not food) can help him or her stay motivated and adhere to the plan. Remember to be sincere; superficiality will be interpreted as condescending and aversive.
• Be realistic. Healthy eating requires conscious effort. People who are trying to lose weight, for example, must adopt eating and exercise patterns that are much more stringent than normal. Don't expect your child to be perfect, or even close to perfect. Occasional slips of overeating, inactivity, weight gain, and failure to adhere to plans will occur. Help your child learn from these experiences rather than dwell on them as “failures.” The key question to ask is not, “Why did you screw up!” Instead, try “What could you do differently the next time a situation like this occurs?”
• Communicate. Occasionally inquire about your child’s progress. Ask how you can help. Be open to discussing the challenges of healthy eating and weight control and to assist in solving problems.

Managing Food

• Increase the amount of nutritious, low-fat foods available to your child.
• Eliminate all high-fat foods from your home. Although food is not technically addictive, many overweight teens have developed an unhealthful psychological dependence on food. And, in this respect, you would do well to manage this dependence in the same way as an addiction: If you had an alcoholic in the family, you wouldn’t have wine for dinner, would you?
• Do NOT encourage your child to eat foods that he or she is trying to avoid. For example, refrain from saying, “Let's go out for ice cream,” or “Oh, come on, a little bit isn't going to hurt you.”
• Ask your child to help prepare foods and recipes in a low-fat way. Encourage experimentation and adventure.
• Adopt appropriate eating habits yourself. For example: avoid eating when full, eat appropriate portions, eat slowly and deliberately, eat regularly or on a schedule, limit snacking, and limit the number of eating situations. You may not have a weight problem, but better eating habits may improve your health and will support your child’s efforts.
• Plan activities with your child that do not revolve around food (for example, outdoor activities, sporting events, concerts, games).
• When you go to a restaurant with your child, select places that make low-fat/low-sugar eating as pleasant as possible.