living the healthy lifestyle

Our scientific studies show that students at Wellspring lose an average of nearly 3 lbs. per week. Best of all, the average student maintains that weight loss at home.

In our book, “The Sierras Weight-Loss Solution for Teens & Kids” from Penguin, 23 Alumni Success Stories are highlighted.  These alumni lost an average of 87 lbs each, and maintained that weight loss at home.

Here are the profiles of the 23 Success Stories from the “The Sierras Solution” book.

DANIEL B.
BRITTANY B.
HILLARY K.
JESSE G.
LINDSAY S.
ALLISON G.
TERRY H.
LAUREN S.

ALISON S.
ANNYA M.
DAN K.
VICKI M.
HENRY E.
LAUREN E.
LAWRENCE M.
TAMARA B.

THERESA G.
JARRETT F.
JILL R.
JAMIE H.
COURTNEY D.
JOSH S.
BECCA M.

Here are some statistics on these alumni:

Gender

(Girls have always outnumbered boys by about 2:1 at Wellspring.)

Weight Loss

Age

Enrollment

 

DANIEL B.
Home: Mesa, AZ
DOB: 5/27/87

Date Enrolled: 9/10/04
Age: 17
Weight: 338
Height: 5’11”

Transition Date: 6/30/05
Age: 18
Weight: 192
Height: 6’0”

Lost 146 lbs. in 10 months.

Current Weight: 205
Current Height: 6’0

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
133 lbs.

Daniel was struggling in high school and had fallen behind when he came to Wellspring Academy of California. He was almost a full year behind his grade level academically, despite substantial intellectual gifts and great potential as a leader. He was also quite depressed. He had a type of depression called anhedonia – nothing seemed pleasurable to him at that time in his life.

During his 9 months at Wellspring, Daniel completed two academic years of study in 9 months, lost 145 lbs, dramatically changed his emotional functioning, and is now studying architecture at Arizona State University.

He was chosen by his peers to give a speech at the Wellspring transition ceremony on June 5, 2005. (We use the term “transition” because no one ever “graduates” from weight control.):

I came to Wellspring under the impression that I would lose a little weight and then go home back to my old ways with no changes, but what I was confronted with has changed my life for the better.

I came here full of ignorance; I honestly thought that I didn’t have any problems. But thanks to this wonderful cluster of comrades I have obtained an entirely new view on life.

I had a lot of problems when I first came here. I couldn’t control my anger, and would become enraged at the drop of a hat.

The worst was probably my depression, which caused me to deem things as boring when they used to be fun; it got so bad that I lost interest in things that I used to enjoy. I came here with every intention of failure, but not a single person here ever gave up on me, even when I gave up on myself.

Thanks to the staff and students at this school, my entire lifestyle was revamped for the better; it was converted from a dark deep hole to amplify my depression, to a fairy tale that I wake up to every day wondering if it has only been a dream.

In short, I guess this school which has been my home for the last 8 ½ months has made me come to terms with myself and who I really am. I could say many things about my stay here but I think the most appropriate would have to be: Thank you. Thank you for making me become myself and not giving up on the one who didn’t even believe in himself. I can’t express how grateful I am to have been here; not only for the changes I have seen in myself but for the changes I have seen in others. Some here may not have changed, but this haven has at least supplied every member of this community with the ability and tools to change when the time is right.

I have been converted into the person that I really am, and don’t think there will ever be any way for me to repay this community. Thank you for this chance that I didn’t even want or suspect, because it has made me a better person, and there is not a gift I could ever give to show how much this matters to me.

BRITTANY B.
Home: Carpinteria, CA
DOB: 2/10/90

Date Enrolled: 9/5/05
Age: 15
Weight: 180
Height: 5’6

Transition Date: 1/28/06
Age: 15
Weight: 133
Height: 5’6

Lost 47 lbs. in 5 months.

Current Weight: 121
Current Height: 5’6

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
59 lbs.

Brittany is a serious and bright girl who spent her early years in California with her parents and younger brother. When she was nine, Brittany’s world changed when she moved to Arizona and her parents divorced. She went from a school with many friends to a school where she was brutally teased by other kids. She became more and more withdrawn, and she moved less and ate more.

Despite the teasing, and Brittany’s realization that she was gaining weight, she did not make many serious efforts to lose weight. She was ashamed to admit she had a problem with eating and her weight.

When Brittany’s parents began talking to her about Wellspring, she said, “I didn’t want people to know my weight was so out of control that I had to attend a boarding school far from home to cope.” In her enrollment package, Brittany circled that she didn’t want to attend, and her parents indicated she was quite angry about the decision.
After a few weeks at Wellspring, Brittany’s attitude changed: “Where else can I have balanced, low fat meals served to me three times a day, or a full gym a few feet away from my bedroom?.”

Brittany utilized her success at Wellspring as a catalyst for other areas of growth. Not only is she now an avid bike rider and weight controller, but she’s doing better in school and in her social life. She feels better about her appearance, and she’s much more confident and open to talking to people – a far cry from the ashamed, angry and isolated life she led prior to attending Wellspring.

Here’s how Brittany put it:

My dad heard about Wellspring Academies on the news. Both he and my mom wanted me to go. We were all having big problems with what I was going to do school-wise. I wanted to home school and my parents didn’t. I was very adamant about not coming to Wellspring. I didn’t want people to know my weight was so out of control that I had to attend a boarding school far from home to cope. Eventually, I looked at the Wellspring program a little more and figured this was a good choice to make at this point in my life. I had no idea how to lose weight in a healthy way and all my other options for schooling were screwed. Days before I left for Wellspring, I actually started to become excited about going.

I really pushed myself to take advantage of the time at Wellspring. I also wanted to commit the things I learned at Wellspring to memory so I could continue with my program when I got home for good. I think that is very important because I don’t want to slip back into my sedentary ways and lose control of my weight again.

HILLARY K.
Home: Seneca, SC
DOB: 6/14/88

Date Enrolled: 7/18/05
Age: 17
Weight: 221
Height: 5’3

Transition Date: 12/20/05
Age: 17
Weight: 161
Height: 5’3

Lost 60 lbs. in 5 months.

Current Weight: 158
Current Height: 5’3

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
63 lbs.

Hillary is a creative and musical young woman who grew up in South Carolina around supportive friends and family. Her weight became a problem in middle school. She tried many diets and attended group meetings and a traditional weight loss camp. Nothing worked. When her mother nagged her not to eat something, Hillary responded by binging and getting upset. When she hit early adolescence, she continued to gain more weight, and eventually attempted to commit suicide.

Hillary agreed to attend Wellspring reluctantly and did not embrace the program at first. She was reeling from the transition to a new environment and coming to terms with the body she had abused over the past few years. In time, she began to open up, particularly after one Wellspring camping trip, and began to embrace the program.
Hillary found herself opening up and being “herself.” Her confidence improved, no longer relying on being the “funny fat chick” to gain friendships.

Hillary is a talented singer/songwriter and often treated Wellspring to her songs, along with her friend and musical partner, Safir R. One of her songs goes like this:

It had been a long time since I could say I was healthy, and happy.
I haven’t felt that way in years.
I was always a chubby child.
I was that blue-green-eyed girl with blonde ringlets, rosy cheeks and a smile.
Tragedy broke me, beat me, and eventually made me stronger.
When I am overwhelmed I swim through it, the past left behind me.

Here’s how Hillary describes her experience a year after transitioning home:

I got really depressed my sophomore year of high school and I think that’s when I gained a lot of the weight. I didn’t really realize how much weight I had gained until the end of my junior year – about when I decided to go to Wellspring. I had great friends and nobody saw me as this huge chick, but I kind of was.

When I got depressed, I stopped caring about what I ate. I wasn’t really that active and I had these two friends who would always call me fat and make fun of me for being Jewish.

I’m so much more confident after losing 60 pounds and keeping it off for a year; that’s for sure. I appreciate myself more and I see who my real friends are, too. Then there is the strange difference in how people treat a person once they’ve lost that much weight. A lot of the school used to think of me like the comic relief fat chick or something like that. They didn’t really look at me as a person. When I came home from Wellspring, it’s like people are checking me out. People are hearing me out and it’s just a different, a whole different environment.

JESSE G.
Home: Toronto, Canada
DOB: 8/23/90

Date Enrolled: 1/30/06
Age: 15
Weight: 322
Height: 5’11

Transition Date: 7/31/06
Age: 15
Weight : 234
Height: 6’0

Lost 88 lbs. in 6 months

Current Weight: 230
Current Height: 6’0

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
92 lbs.

Jesse was born and raised in Toronto, Canada. He grew up in a close-knit family and has traveled around the world.

Weight began to affect Jesse at school, where he was called names and excluded by other kids. Jesse says he felt powerless to stop the rapid weight gain, and even went for brain imaging to search for the root of the problem, to no avail. As Jesse’s mother had successfully controlled her weight over a long period of time after struggling as a teen, she brought him to a group support weight loss program where he was by far the youngest member. His mother, who also has a degree in nutrition, suggested a number of diets for him. None of them worked. Jesse tried starving himself, and he tried purging. That didn’t work either.

After years of feeling powerless and many negative experiences with peers, Jesse found himself lacking the confidence to play sports. So he ate out of boredom and he watched television. When Jesse’s mother suggested Wellspring , Jesse melted the DVD and threw away the brochure, refusing to consider the program. However, one day after finding himself out of breath and sweating after climbing a single flight of stairs, Jesse resigned himself to finding a long term solution to his weight problem.

Upon arrival, Jesse experienced a rough adjustment from the comforts at home, but embraced the program after losing 15 lbs in 2 weeks. “Where else is this possible?” he asked himself. “There is no doubt this place works.” On his first trip off-campus, Jesse found himself willingly hiking for exercise and ordering wisely in restaurants to stay on program. Jesse experienced the gratification that comes from being in control of his weight for the first time. While various experiences at Wellspring were frustrating for Jesse, such as staying on track around pizza, Jesse succeeded at Wellspring because he discovered he could “change his life and keep the change.”

Six months after returning home, Jesse describes his journey like this:

From as long as I can remember, I was an overweight kid, and I was always bigger than everybody else. I just got used to it and I was made fun of a lot, but that was just the way life was. I was always made fun of and left out of sports, so I just got used to it.

I mostly used food when I was bored. I think because I was overweight, I didn’t have anything to do, didn’t have many friends, and wasn’t involved in many after school things, so I just ended up watching TV and eating.

I first heard about Wellspring when my mom called for information. I think that alone really angered me because she was trying to make decisions for me. So, I was just instantly against it. I ripped up the information. I melted the DVD and then I took it all and shoved it in the bottom of the garbage can so no one could see it. Then, one day, I had a big bowl of ice cream. I ran up into my room, sat down in front of my computer, and I was just panting. I looked at myself in the mirror and just realized I needed help. So, I just said to my mom, “I think I should go to Wellspring .”

Now, six months after leaving Wellspring , I don’t want to set goals for myself that I won’t be able to keep. I may not be losing weight as fast, but I’m not gaining weight and I’m staying with it. Before Wellspring I was pretty pessimistic. Now I’m more optimistic and happier with my life.

LINDSAY S.
Home: Palo Alto, CA
DOB: 3/29/89

Date Enrolled: 1/2/06
Age: 17
Weight: 248
Height: 5’2

Transition Date: 12/22/06
Age: 17
Weight: 174
Height: 5’2

Lost 74 lbs. in 12 months

Current Weight: 168
Current Height: 5’2

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
80 lbs.

Lindsay is from a comfortable home in the Bay Area of California. She was heavy for as long as she can remember. She remembers being taunted and teased by other kids, and also being upset when her dad traveled frequently for work. She began to develop a distrust of people, especially adults.

Food is what Lindsay began to use as a coping mechanism. Over time, she adopted facades to hide her true feelings – she used drugs and got tattoos and piercings.

Despite this external denial, Lindsay made several attempts to lose weight, including prescription drugs as well as traditional weight loss camps. After hitting 250 lbs. on a small frame, Lindsay asked her parents to come to Wellspring.

Although it was Lindsay’s idea to attend Wellspring, she resisted the program for a long time. Lindsay’s creative mind resisted certain program rules. But as her weight loss progressed, and as she was able to safely remove her masks, she began to embrace the program and the control it gave her over her body – something she had never had. Lindsay became an avid runner and cook, working with very low-fat recipes. She’s particularly adept at preparing very low-fat Indian food. She also painted murals on several of the buildings on campus.

Back home, Lindsay now enjoys more open communication with friends and family as well as staying very active through running and riding around San Francisco Bay on her beach cruiser.

ALLISON G.
Home: Wichita, KS
DOB: 10/20/86

Date Enrolled: 12/27/05
Age: 20
Weight: 244
Height: 5’1

Transition Date: 6/16/06
Age: 20
Weight: 169
Height: 5’1

Lost 75 lbs. in 6 months

Current Weight: 168
Current Height: 5’2

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
84 lbs.

After an unsuccessful semester at college, Allison decided to return to high school for a semester to attend Wellspring. At the age of 20, for the first time in her life, Allison was prepared to face her weight problems head-on.

According to Allison, she had always been a “chubby” kid who seemed to eat more than other kids her age. She was picked on throughout elementary school and became increasingly depressed as time went on. She felt hopeless about her weight and bad about herself. This was exacerbated by repeated failures at Weight Watchers, with the Atkins diet, and many others.

Prior to Wellspring she lived a very sedentary lifestyle. She loved to read and she became quite a good writer. Allison found that Wellspring opened her eyes to a lot about herself and gave her energy she didn’t know she could possibly have.

Here is what Allison wrote several months after she arrived at Wellspring:

In elementary school, I learned to read and fell in love with it. This contributed to my weight gain, by being sedentary a lot. I read all the time, even during math class. Reading too much was pretty much all I got reprimanded for, so I wasn't a "bad" kid. I was smart, but not inclined to do sports. I only did them to appease my parents when they suggested I participate in a sport or some kind of physical activity. I was an outgoing kid, and a little bossy sometimes, but that comes with being an only child. My parents always made sure that we ate healthy. I think everyone thought I was a smart but chubby child who would grow out of the baby fat stage.

In fifth grade, my life was awful. My classmates picked on me for being chubby and for my big hair and glasses. I began eating more sweets; sleeping over at a friend's house was just an excuse to get more candy and junk food. A high point came though: I got to do the crosswalk with the stop signs and whistles. I was excited, especially when I got to blow the whistle. But when it got cold that year, my teacher, Mrs. Baughns, gave us hot cocoa. When my mom found that out, she talked to my teacher and gave her some low calorie cocoa, so Mrs. Baughns had to cook it separate from the other kids' and it made me feel like an outcast. The school year ended and I was still very unhappy.

My mom signed me up for a sailing club, down by the river. That summer, I had so much fun, and I was being really active. I got down to a healthier weight and felt a lot better starting middle school in the fall.

Sixth grade was a blast. I made a bunch of new friends and, sadly, I learned that instead of waiting for holiday parties or sleeping over at a friend's house, you could just buy junk food at school. I gained most of the weight I'd naturally lost over that last summer, and gained more. After school all I would do is sit on my rear and play Super Mario Brothers or Nintendo.

I went to a private school for seventh and eighth grade and the students there were very snotty. I was very different from them in many aspects, not just that I was overweight and they were at a healthy weight. We dressed differently, had different hobbies and I was not snobby. I made a lot of good friends there, but I also learned that wherever you go, there you are. You have to make the best of every situation, even if everyone is different from you. I wasn't picked on because of my weight, I was just treated differently. I wasn't invited to pool parties or slumber parties by the popular girls, but I had my own friends. I guess I was respected even despite our physical and emotional differences because at our eighth grade graduation, I was awarded the Silent Hero Award; it was a great experience. But the day after eighth grade graduation, my grandma on my mother's side passed away from a heart attack. This was particularly an unpleasant event, not only because my mom and I loved her so very much, but also, as my dad pointed out, she died because she was overweight. It was horrible to try to grieve when all my dad could do was point out that I was going to die of the same thing if I didn't change.

Around this time I had become very talented at stealing small change from my parents and buying food with this money. That summer I worked for my aunt in the mornings, filing papers and bills for her. In the afternoons I would ride my bike around and, most of the time, buy food. I bought some Tylenol PM and started taking two tablets and going to sleep around 4:30 or 5 p.m., just telling my mom that I had biked a lot and I was tired. I know now that it's wrong, but at the time, it was my escape. One afternoon, after a verbal argument with my father, I rode my bike about 30 miles across town, in 105 degree heat. I felt too weak and too ill to bike back and it was about 5:30 p.m. and I didn't have any money to take a cab. So I called my aunt and uncle and asked them to come pick me up, knowing that my parents would flip out.

The summer before my freshman year of high school, I went through a lot, but I matured as well. One day my dad gave me a lecture that I should lose weight, all the while saying things like, "If you don't lose weight, you'll be a fat cow who weighs 300 pounds!" I was upset, crying and I went to my room. But my dad wasn't finished talking to me yet and he burst into my room. He continued yelling and calling me a liar, telling me to tell the truth about my eating. I got so angry and scared with him in my room, alone, I just stood up and screamed, "I HATE YOU! FUCK YOU!" He stopped yelling and went out of my room. I was so scared, but relieved at the same time. Things coasted after that, but all of our feelings were buried deep and not out there until we were yelling and screaming at each other.

My sophomore year started out great; I made a top choir and I was starting to make more friends. I was participating and having a blast. I had a great sixteenth birthday party with a bunch of friends. I really enjoyed my classes and I was doing well. But then a horrible thing happened. My best friend Shelly died in a car accident with my other best friend Krystal driving the car. Shelly died instantly, so there was no physical pain for her, but for me it was devastating. I went into a deep depression, but not one that most could see. I slowly retreated from my friends, started smoking pot, being promiscuous with boys I didn't really like and having a horrible attitude. During this time, I started to eat a lot more food, mostly just junk. My dad pressured me more and more, offering me money or a car if I would only lose weight. "I just can't," I said. I worked as a lifeguard that summer and, even though I was more physically active, I was still eating too many fatty calories to even maintain my weight. I started smoking pot around three to four times a week in the evenings and on my days off from the pool.

Around the time I finished high school, I started to hang out with someone that had graduated before me. He seemed nice and we were getting along really well. We became attracted to each other and were physically intimate, but nothing serious. We broke up after a horrible fight. This traumatized me and I sank into another deep depression. I was still eating to comfort myself for the pain that I was feeling and my parents continued to badger me to lose weight. They continued to weigh me regularly; every instance was humiliating. I weighed around 220 pounds and kept steadily gaining weight. My mental strength was failing under the pressure from my parents and I felt hopeless.

I decided to move out of my house. I wanted to live with my half sister and her husband, but my mom pleaded with me to live with my aunt. I finished my senior year of high school at my aunt's house. Graduation came with excitement and extreme disappointment. I was devastated, though, when my father did not attend my graduation ceremony. I was told he did not come because he did not want to see me morbidly obese, walking across the stage. He said it hurt him too much, but I'm sure that it hurt me more.

That summer I stumbled across an excellent job – working as a receptionist for a branch of the federal government. I got along really well with all the staff, but I spent all of my money on food. I would've done better to flush every paycheck down the toilet. I was ruining my body slowly, eating too much one day, and then barely enough the next.

In the fall of 2005, I attended Wichita State University. At the end of the semester, I ended up failing 4 out of 7 classes due to lack of attendance. I was at the lowest of low points. No family members trusted me and I felt completely hopeless. Then my parents offered me Wellspring. I knew it was a big step as I am 19. I researched it and knew I wanted to go. I was scared, but I felt like it could only get better, not worse.

So far I have lost over 65 pounds and I can now say that I can deal with life on life's terms, instead of food's terms. I have many positive coping skills and have learned a great deal about myself. I would say that I am strong, self-motivated and excited. Some days I wake up and I think to myself, I am going to lose my weight!!! I can do it! Because of my coping skills, I can now say that I am a strong person. I have become self-motivated to set goals and achieve them.

When I was in my last two years of high school, I couldn't see past my graduation from the twelfth grade. I procrastinated turning in a college application and taking responsibility for my life as an adult. I didn't have goals because I believed I couldn't achieve them. Although I am uncertain about my future, I know that it is very bright because of the changes that I have made since coming here. When I go home I plan to get a job that will involve helping others exercise, and attending college to study health science. I want to have a career that will help obese adolescents like us lose weight and learn how to live a healthy lifestyle. My main goals in life are to consistently improve myself emotionally and physically and, most of all, help others.

The key ingredient that Wellspring has given me is faith in myself.

TERRY H.
Home: Exeter, NH
DOB: 9/23/88

Date of Enrollment: 9/7/04
Age: 15
Weight: 558
Height: 6’0

Transition Date: 12/15/05
Age: 17
Weight: 253
Height: 6’0

Lost 305 lbs. in 16 months

Current Weight: 278
Current Height: 6’0

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
280 lbs.

Terry came into the world bigger than most; he was over 10 lbs at birth. This continued into his school-age years. He painfully recalled how he had to wait for a custodian to bring a high school desk to his 5th grade classroom before he could sit with the rest of his class. In time, other kids would torment Terry. Terry would defend himself by using his size and anger to make others afraid of him.

Terry’s self-esteem plummeted through experiences of rejection from girls and even from the football team because he was so heavy. He moved several times and did not have a chance to make friends. He only survived by intimidating others so that they would stay away from him.

Then, at the age of 11, his father was sent to prison. Terry was supposed to assume the insurmountable task of becoming the “man of the house,” or at least that’s how he viewed it. This unrealistic responsibility from his mother and 4 older sisters only further contributed to his failing self-esteem.

In a few short years Terry weighed over 500 lbs. He continued to feel angry, depressed and hopeless. Eating excessively became a means of escape and his weight escalated to nearly 600 lbs, making him one of the heaviest human beings in the world, and perhaps the heaviest for his age.

Terry tried several weight loss programs and even gained weight while attempting one. When he arrived at Wellspring, Terry had piercings all over his face, dressed like a “goth” and had a range of violent T-shirts and posters. He was also in denial about his physical limitations, telling the Directors he loved street hockey and had played it “all day” frequently over the summer. At the same time, Terry couldn’t walk from the dorm to the dining hall without stopping to catch his breath. When Terry was asked to do his first timed mile, it took him almost 30 minutes, and he had to be picked up by a van at the end.

At first, Terry didn’t believe Wellspring would work for him because he had tried and failed so many times. It was only the rapidly falling numbers on the scale during his weekly weigh-ins that convinced him it might actually work.

Terry began to open up and face his past and the emotional hurt and frustration from out-of-control weight gain.

At this point, Terry began to fully engage in the program and he maintained a high level of consistency through his remarkable 300+ pound weight loss. Soon he could walk a mile in 13 minutes. By the end of his enrollment, he achieved his personal goal of running the mile in less than 9 minutes. He also began a job on campus, working with the maintenance crew in the auto shop (his favorite place) and helping with upkeep of the campus.

For Terry, the honesty in the Wellspring Program is invaluable. He had lived in denial about his eating and his physical capabilities for much of his young life. He refuses to go back to that now that he has seen an alternative that works. Shortly before he returned home, Terry went clothes shopping with the Clinical Director and purchased a range of Abercrombie & Fitch shirts and pants that he would have scoffed at a year-and-a-half before.

Upon his transition home, Wellspring dedicated the auto shop in his name. A plaque was unveiled to commemorate the occasion.

Here is how Terry characterizes his experience:

When I was a baby I was described by my mother and other family as a ‘butterball turkey.’ I was the sparkle in the corner of my parents' eyes, being the youngest and only boy (of 5 children). The world around you is very judgmental; even as a baby, people would always comment to my parents on how big I was. But my parents didn't care. They were just happy to have their son.

The first day of pre-kindergarten was when the tormenting started. A little girl with red hair and freckles came up to me and said to my face, ‘You're fat!’ I didn't let it get me down, though; I was friends with everyone. At first I would dismiss this and say that they didn't know what they were talking about. I was pretty big, about twice the size of my classmates. But it never did stop me or slow me down. There were endless possibilities for me. I always dreamed of becoming a mechanic like my father and also that I would eventually lose all this weight and become successful.

Becoming a teenager was even harder. All I wanted was acceptance. I never really was accepted, so I made everyone afraid of me. I always told myself that I was normal, even though I wasn't. My life was on a downward spiral of doom. My family had to adjust to my weight, buying reinforced furniture and even oversized cars to fit me. I always had to have a bigger desk brought in to fit my needs in school. When I was in 5th grade, I had to sit in a high school desk, which also made me stand out. I remember waiting for that desk on the first day of school. It took a half hour and the other kids just stared at me and snickered. I hated that and all of them. I really didn't look forward to the future. I was struggling to get by, day by day.

As I matured and became more independent, I became even more stubborn. There used to be a little flame in my eyes and, as I became older, it slowly faded away, along with my self-esteem. I had a lot of control over what went into me, yet it was always filled with lard. I became a 591 lb. depressed teenager in desperate need of exercise and emotional health. I had expectations of losing weight miraculously. Somehow it didn't turn out the way I planned, like when I tried out for the football team and got rejected for being obese and out of shape. Even through a bad situation, like that rejection, I managed myself through it.

The most significant change in my life in the present period of time is that now I believe I can do anything, as long as I put my mind to it. I used to believe that I couldn't, but Wellspring has changed my mind, changed the way I think. For that, I am grateful. Three words to describe me today are motivated, positive and strong/confident. I am now motivated toward my goal of losing weight, now that I know I can. I am going to try my best to stay positive through this roller coaster ride. I am still confident and strong willed. I will succeed.

LAUREN S.
Home: Calabasas, CA
DOB: 3/19/91

Date Enrolled: 8/26/05
Age: 15
Weight: 226
Height: 5’4

Transition Date: 12/31/05
Age: 15
Weight: 176
Height: 5’4

Lost 50 lbs. in 4 months

Current Weight: 162
Current Height: 5’4

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
64 lbs.

Lauren grew up in a comfortable home in Southern California. She was overweight from the time she was quite young, joining a Weight Watchers group with her mother when she was 8. She yearned to fit into the “cute” Abercrombie & Fitch clothes her friends wore. She also struggled to keep up with her friends in activities. Lauren developed a sense of humor about these challenges and was always well liked by her friends. Her parents continued to encourage her to lose weight, but to Lauren it felt like she was being “hounded.”

After a particularly tough year, Lauren agreed to attend Wellspring . Lauren began her time at Wellspring in a special four-week camping program. She learned that she was going to have to make a substantial effort in order to succeed. Lauren was extraordinarily successful at Wellspring , rocketing through the program and winning many accolades.

The following excerpt from her writing shows Lauren’s frame of mind near the end of her time at Wellspring :

Over three months ago I walked onto the Wellspring campus, unaware of what I was about to get myself into, and here I am now. Even though I have been through extremely hard times, I am glad I stuck it out. Since day one I did not want to be here. My first night I cried so much I made myself sick and told everyone who would listen that I was going to run away.

Before I got to Wellspring , I was constantly depressed, crying for no reason, staying in my house, and only going out for school and food. I was emotionally drained and damaged by my grandmother's death 9 months earlier, a good friend's suicide 2 months before, a brother going through rehab, and not being happy with myself on top of it all. Now, away from the only support I once had, my friends and family, and never having been away from home before, I was miserable. I was more homesick than I thought anyone could be. All I wanted to do was go home for the first month; all I could think about was how much I basically hated this place and I didn't want to admit that I needed to be here.

I put myself to the test and worked through blaming myself for things like my good friend's suicide and my brother ending up in rehab. It wasn't my fault and I knew I had to stop blaming myself. I look back at what I was then compared to what I am now and the only thing that truly explains what I am today is what my BC (her behavioral coach at Wellspring ) told me from day one. I thought of myself as a worthless dirt cloud, when really, after working through all the "dirt" and rough spots, I am starting to see a diamond.

This experience that I was so unsure of facing has ended up being the most life-changing and mind-changing event that will ever happen to me. I have grown emotionally stronger as I have begun shrinking away physically, mentally stronger, and an all around different person. Working so hard and pushing myself beyond my limits has never paid off so much.

Today I think about what I’ll do when I go home, and what I’ll be doing when I am eighteen or twenty. All that is safe for me to say now is that I am committed to staying a long-term weight controller and continuing to use the coping skills I have gained here. I won't let myself go back to someone who eats anything in sight or binges the second her parents walk out the door. Never ever do I want to see again the days of being too upset and unhappy with myself to go to the mall with my friends or being too ashamed to throw on a bathing suit and go for a swim or hiding in sweats and sweatshirts in 100 degree weather. I like the new me. I like fitting into cute clothes and being able to cope with my emotions that can run everywhere at once, or sneak up out of nowhere.

As my time at Wellspring is coming to an end, I look at how far I have come in utter amazement and, at the same time, with a sense of disgust as to what I once was. My goals of staying a long-term weight controller and to exercise daily are as important to me as my long-term goals of being happy with myself and learning how to become happier. Staying here and pushing myself as hard as I could, even through the hard times and the fact that I wanted to go home, have let me prove to myself I can do anything I set my mind to. My future lies ahead of me, waiting to be uncovered. I will not forget the past. As I turn away and wish it farewell, I promise that my present self will no longer dwell on the past. My future awaits me.

ALISON S.
Home: Bedford, NY
DOB: 1/11/92

Date Enrolled: 1/2/06
Age: 13
Weight: 196
Height: 5’1

Transition Date: 6/1/06
Age: 14
Weight: 146
Height: 5’1

Lost 50 lbs. in 5 months

Current Weight: 150
Current Height: 5’1

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
46 lbs.

Alison grew up in wealthy suburb of New York with three sisters. She’s very close to her sisters and parents.

Growing up, she remembers always being chubbier than everyone else. During elementary school she started to realize that she was different from the other kids at school. She would hang out with only one or two friends at a time and read. She saw herself as a boring person who “just had to get by.”

She began putting on weight in middle school. She struggled with her group of friends at that age. She wore jeans and a baggy sweatshirt every day. She dreaded parties and other social events because she was so uncomfortable with herself. When her parents brought up her weight she would get angry and defensive, denying that her weight was a problem. She would say: “I’m comfortable with it, you guys are the ones that are uncomfortable with it.”

But, as she remembers, “every time one of my friends (who were half my size) would complain about having to lose weight, every time my family tried to help me diet or exercise and failed, every time that number on the scale rose, I felt worse and worse.” She fought with her family constantly and claims she secretly loathed her friends, and slowly, began to hate herself.

She tried losing weight in many different ways. She used the South Beach diet, she went to a diet camp. But her successes were only temporary; she gained all the weight back each time. She would often get discouraged and talk herself out of her problem, thinking “well I’d rather be happy and eat what I want than be unhappy and be skinny all the time.”

Throughout childhood, Alison devoted herself to the arts. She particularly loved ballet. The turning point came when she was getting ready to begin pointe, which means dancing on your toes. She had to be checked out by a doctor to make sure she was strong enough to sustain her weight on her toes. When she went to the doctor he told her that her weight was such that she would crush her feet. Her desire to continue dancing is what pushed her to finally find a solution to her weight.

Six months later, Alison left Wellspring 50 lbs. lighter. She describes herself as a completely changed person, both physically and emotionally. Her relationship with her family has improved greatly; the arguments have disappeared and everyone is enjoying themselves much more.

Three months after enrolling at Wellspring Alison wrote the following:

I didn't realize that it wasn't my weight that made others see me as untouchable. In fact, they saw me as an intelligent person. I created the idea that I was a loner when I withdrew from everyone. It was then that everyone began to see me as smart, but not much fun to be around.

For me, the future was a long way off at the time. My hopes and dreams were to be whatever excited me at the moment: a singer, an actress, a model, a teacher, etc. I was focused on the here and now.

My perspective on life did a complete 180 in middle school. I guess you could say what sparked these changes was simply knowing too much. I became very cynical. I viewed America as a dictatorship that was bent on controlling third world countries; human beings were just cruel creatures who were unable to live with each other and the rest of the world.

I started to slowly hate myself and wished I could just hurry up and die. But I never had the guts to do anything. I kept up the pretense that I was a happy, normal, good student, who never did anything wrong. I did not want to think about my future, because I didn't want to experience it.

In elementary school I was shy, but content, and I knew what I was doing. I loved my family and wanted to do everything with them. In junior high, I was unhappy. Things were happening that I had no control over and time was going by too fast. I started to hate my family. I basically became very negative because I was growing up and I didn't want to.

I would describe myself as fake, unhappy and unsure at this period of time. I was fake because I was pretending to be happy and okay when really I was slowly dying on the inside. I chose unhappy because that's what I was at the time; there's no other word for it. And I chose unsure because I had no control over my life. I didn't know what I wanted to do and what I could do to make me happier.

I have made huge changes since coming to Wellspring . I have little or no thoughts about hurting myself or dying because, for once in my life, I am truly happy. Because I'm loving myself for who I am and I am more comfortable with myself, I am starting to think about what motivates people to do things, both good and bad. When someone is mad or upset, I try to imagine how that person is thinking so I can be more accepting and comforting to him or her. I am becoming a positive influence.

I would describe myself with these three expressions: truly intelligent; persevering; and motivated. I have finally reached the point of true intelligence because now, not only am I booksmart, I'm lifesmart. I am on my way to becoming an LTWC and I know how to keep myself emotionally okay.

ANNYA M.
Home: Orosi, CA
DOB: 7/17/91

Date Enrolled: 9/5/05
Age: 14
Weight: 407
Height: 5’2

Transition Date: 6/17/06
Age: 14
Weight: 256
Height: 5’2

Lost 151 lbs. in 9 months

Returned to Wellspring : 10/2/06
Weight: 250
Height: 5’2

Current Weight: 214
Current Height: 5’2

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
193 lbs.

Annya grew up in a small community in California’s San Joaquin Valley. She remembers being overweight her entire life. Third grade was when other kids began teasing her and also when she started suffering from sleep apnea - a common serious respiratory condition in seriously overweight people. Sleep apnea means you literally stop breathing at night, which wakes you up and requires a machine that pumps in oxygen as you sleep.

Annya tried to hide herself from other people as much as possible. Arriving at Wellspring with 407 lbs on her 5’2 frame, she attributed a significant portion of this weight to sedentary behavior as a result of isolating herself, which prevented activity and promoted even more problematic eating. She felt like a freak because of the hurtful stares she experienced whenever she strayed outside, such as in malls and sporting events. This drove Annya further inside, literally. Annya noted, “I wouldn’t like to see anyone. I wouldn’t want them to see me.”

During Annya’s first enrollment at Wellspring , she lost 150 lbs. She was due to return after a family trip away from campus, but found it challenging to be away from her family. So she opted to return home.

While she continued losing a moderate amount of weight at home, it wasn’t as fast as she wanted. So she convinced her parents to send her back to Wellspring again. Since she has returned, she has lost another 35 lbs. and is enjoying vastly improved physical health. Her sleep apnea is completely gone and she has cut the amount of time it takes her to walk/run a mile by 50%.

Before learning to control her weight, including gaining confidence in her favorite sport of soccer, Annya turned to the television for company. Now she says television is boring. She walks with her mother almost every morning when she’s home and teaches her younger brother to play soccer.

Annya described her journey in this way:

In elementary school I was really shy and didn't hang out with lots of friends. People used to make fun of me about my weight. I started getting heavy around 1st grade. When they made fun of me, I wouldn't protect myself. I was really nice and sweet. If people were new, I would say hi to them.

I got good grades when I was little. I was a little fat girl getting heavier and heavier. I didn't care if I got heavier. I wouldn't do anything about it. I couldn't do anything, such as run or play sports.

At junior high school, kids would sometimes make fun of me behind my back. They would talk about me like they didn't know I was hearing them and I didn't have any feelings.

I had lots of problems with my weight. My parents and I couldn't really find clothes or shoes that fit me. My parents were getting worried. More kids started making fun of me. I struggled the most when I was in 7th grade because that's when lots of kids made fun of me.

Lazy, sad, and scared are the words that described me at this time of my life. I was lazy. I didn't want to do anything. I was sad all the time about my weight. I was always scared that I would die at a young age.

The biggest change in my life was coming here to Wellspring . I am so happy to be here.

My dream is to be a dentist or a Spanish singer or a Spanish actor. I'm caring, shy, and kind. I care about what happens to others. I'm shy because I guess I feel like I'm not good enough for anyone. So, I get nervous and scared. I'm kind because I want people to treat me the same way – with kindness.

DAN K.
Home: Omaha, NE
DOB: 12/28/89

Date Enrolled: 9/7/05
Age: 15
Weight: 287 lbs
Height: 5’9”

Transition Date: 6/5/06
Age: 16
Weight: 158 lbs
Height: 5’9

Lost 129 lbs. in 9 months

Current Weight: 172 lbs
Current Height: 5’10

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
128 lbs.

Dan arrived at Wellspring hopelessly depressed and feeling hopeless about the future. Dan’s earliest memory is breaking a Christmas gift and from that time on he internalized a great deal of negativity based on failing experiences and taunting by other kids due to his weight and obsessive tendencies. Although he did quite well in school, he was socially isolated – he had few friends and spent most of his time playing video games and reading.

Dan changed dramatically at Wellspring and was not only accepted, but loved by all. From a withdrawn, shy, self-described “ball of misery and hate,” he became Seymour Krelboyne, the nerdy but lovable lead in a remarkable production of “Little Shop of Horrors.” Dan’s numbers were show stoppers as he mesmerized the audience with his amazing singing. The Wellspring community buzzed for months about Dan’s performance after the curtain was drawn for the final time.

Here is Dan in his own words:

You see me before you, a happy, healthy young man, excited about life and his future. I wish I could say that this is how it always was, but alas – this is nowhere near reality. Just six short months ago, I was a physical, emotional, and mental wreck.

For as long as I can remember, I've always had a weight problem. Since kindergarten, I would be playing games with friends and finding out (often painfully and embarrassingly) that I couldn't do everything they could. When the older kids would call me names, the others would join in. I found out the hard way that young children don't always understand the meaning of friendship. Being an extremely sensitive individual, I would often cry and scream. An image was forming in my head – one that told me that I was weak, inferior, and worthless.

This image buried itself in my subconscious and fed off of my peers' taunts. In exchange, it gave off insecurity, doubt, and pessimism – pretty much nothing good. Like a beast in waiting, it grew, and grew, and grew, and grew until I believed everything negative about myself that everyone said to me. When it grew large enough, it moved to my conscious mind and started to breed depression.

In the summer of 2001 (when I was 10), I suffered a breakdown in which I had to be hospitalized. I feared that anything I would attempt to ingest would lodge itself in my windpipe and cause me to choke to death. My developing demon gained a huge boost from this incident on account of me thinking I was a freakish, lunatic asylum inmate.

With this occurrence still fresh in my psyche, I went into Junior High. Wow – that was a fiasco. You might think that as the kids around me grew older, they'd learn that they were truly hurting me and lay off. But that would be in an ideal world – one in which airplanes aren't hijacked and used for mass murder (which, incidentally, had just happened at that time). As my peers grew older, their ridicule and cruelty got worse and worse (my demon flourished in this storm of negativity and used it to his advantage).

He waited until 8th grade and took his opportunity to attempt to destroy me. By this time, I was a pessimistic 287-lb. ball of misery and hate. I hated school; I hated life; but, above all, I hated myself. I wasn't ever happy. I began having thoughts of suicide.

Luckily, I had been seeing a therapist since the episode in 2001, and I was again hospitalized. Thanks to friends, family and "Five for Fighting", I saw what I had become. I decided to continue with life – a life in which I had so much time left. As it says in the song"100 Years":
"Fifteen, there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
Fifteen – there's never a better than this
When you've only got a hundred years to live."

I promised myself I'd never, ever let myself get that low ever again. Now this demon I mentioned may seem like an effort to take the responsibility off of myself. However, if you trapped him and took off his demonic mask, do you know who you would see? You would see me. This "Idea", this "Demon", if you will, was but a part of me. I was fighting a battle against myself (which usually makes it much more difficult).

As I entered High School, I was still a 290-lb. wreck – I was not, however, a 290-lb. suicidal wreck. I could feel happy, but these moments were often temporary, quickly overshadowed by depression. Then my mom heard about Wellspring , and a week later I arrived here.

After six months, I can no longer call myself a 290-lb. emotional wreck. Hell, I can't even call myself a wreck! The part of me that wanted to destroy everything is now working to better itself. And though I'm still somewhat insecure and unhappy at times, it's far, far from the old me that would write all over his desk about how much he hated it all.

It has been said that you cannot love others until you love yourself. I know now that this saying is 100% true. I can truly appreciate all of the love and kindness given me and even dish it out (as opposed to being a contagious black cloud of unhappiness). For perhaps the first time in my life, I can safely say that I am happy and I love myself. Six short months ago, I never even thought I'd see the day where I could say that honestly.

Not only this, but my physical self has also drastically improved. 103 pounds lighter, I can run, jump, and do things that everyone else can, too (which is so wonderful after all these years of trying). I know now that I am not worthless or inferior, because if I was it would have been impossible for me to have lost all of that weight.

I have improved by leaps and bounds (and am continuing to improve day-by-day). Over my time here, I have made tremendous and monumental achievements that I am truly proud of. I'm not yet sure what the future holds, but I plan on facing it head-on, full of enthusiasm.

VICKI M.
HOME: Fairfax, VA
DOB: 9/7/1991

Date of enrollment: 1/1/06
Age: 14
Weight: 230
Height: 5’6

Transition Date: 6/2/06
Age: 14
Weight: 164
Height: 5’6

Lost 66 lbs. in 6 months

Current Weight: 176
Current Height: 5’6

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
54 lbs.

Vicki recalls being teased because of her weight from 4th grade on. While she loved dancing, she was constantly taunted by other kids who said she was too fat to dance or that she would break the stage. Soon she resigned herself to being fat and would eat to deal with her feelings and loneliness. She needed to “fill the hole.”

Vicki’s parents encouraged her to participate in a structured weight loss program and attend a diet camp. She gained more weight after both attempts. Vicki recalls thinking she was doing the right thing to lose weight, but in hindsight realizes she didn’t think she had control over her weight and therefore would eat out of her parents’ sight.

When another kid humiliated Vicki in front of her entire high school freshman class, Vicki made a decision to attend Wellspring . At first, Vicki had difficulty taking the program seriously and gained weight the first few times she went off campus. As she progressed in the program, she found her new skills allowed her to keep control. Before she knew it, she was an LTWC, telling servers in restaurants that she was allergic to butter and oil and impressing her friends with snacks of carrot sticks. Now, Vicki is excited to be a trend-setter in healthy living. She has overcome her biology and enjoys being healthy and feeling good about herself.

HENRY E.
Home: Columbus, OH
DOB: 1/27/88

Date Enrolled: 1/10/05
Age: 16
Weight: 308
Height: 6’0

Transition Date: 6/30/05
Age: 17
Weight: 200
Height: 6’0

Lost 108 lbs. in 6 months

Current Weight: 206
Height: 6’1

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
108 lbs.

Henry was born in Chicago and raised in Florida by two loving parents. His mother claims that his first word was “more” and he developed a weight problem as a child. Although he struggled with attention-control issues in elementary school, he became an excellent student and later a very skilled tennis player.

To lose weight, Henry tried Weight Watchers, the South Beach Diet, and the Atkins diet. He actually lost 40 lbs on Atkins “but then [he] slowly gained it back, and then gained more.” Before arriving at Wellspring , he had given up to the point that he thought it would be best to keep eating a lot so that he could qualify for bariatric surgery.

Henry is now in his sophomore year at Miami University in Ohio.

Shortly before completing his time at Wellspring , Henry wrote the following:

I had been heavy my entire life. In high school, freshman year I was an outcast. I was under the impression that everyone did not like me and that none of my peers wanted anything to do with me. I had friends, but I even doubted that they liked me. I was only 40 lbs overweight, but I was very self-conscious about it. I thought everyone made fun of me behind my back. I thought that my weight held me back from success and popularity in this world, but it was really my mind, over-thinking things. Every day of my life was hell, because I let it be.

I used tennis to cope with my unhappiness and I didn’t keep gaining weight because of the tremendous amount of time I put into the game. My eating habits were awful; I ate many thousands of high fat calories a day, but three to four hours a day of tennis prevented continued weight gain.

On the tennis court, I just thought about becoming a better player, not about whether anyone liked me. I had a tennis coach who had a huge influence on me and became like a second mother to me.

Before my junior year my coach left spontaneously, without warning, never to return. This completely devastated me as she didn't even bother to say goodbye. I was crushed by this and ended up giving up on my tennis. This was something I loved more than anything at the time. I started my junior year without my favorite coping skill to fall back upon in case of social troubles. I overcame my thinking problem and thought for the first time ever, maybe they do like me or maybe they do want to hang out with me. I became a lot more social and my friendships flourished. However, during this time period I began to binge eat. I was eating like crazy. I would generally eat over fifteen thousand calories a day and over a thousand grams of fat a day. I ate as much fat in one day as I would in over fifty days at Wellspring . It was that bad.

Also, during this time I found out I was moving to Columbus, Ohio. My parents would occasionally tell me that I needed to come to Wellspring and that when we moved it would be the perfect opportunity to do so, but I never listened. By January, when we moved to Ohio, I weighed over three hundred pounds. That meant that I had gained over sixty pounds in the previous five months and I was scared to death. It was then that I made the decision that would change my life – the decision to come to Wellspring .

I arrived at Wellspring on January 10th, weighing 308 pounds. I came here thinking this place would be an awful hell hole. I thought there would be no social life here and that I would be miserable. But, in fact, my social life here has been better than anywhere else. I made friends here really easily because we all could relate to each other. I made relationships here that were stronger than I even knew relationships could be.

This school changed my life in so many aspects. Not only did it affect me socially and physically, but mentally. I no longer feel like people talk about me behind my back and, if they do, I no longer fear what they are saying. This program helped me lose over one hundred pounds and my negative self-view. I came here paranoid about what people thought of me and I will leave knowing that what they think is of no importance to me; what really matters is how I view myself.

If I didn't come to Wellspring , my future would have been very grim. I would, at this point, probably weigh over 400 pounds, because of the mind-boggling rate at which I had been gaining weight. I would still have all my social inadequacy problems and my relationships with what few friends I had would not be that strong. Basically, I would be on the fast track to a short and miserable life that would be threatened at an early age due to health reasons.

Because of all the change that has occurred, my future looks a lot brighter. I am now almost at my goal weight and have made very significant emotional changes. I am confident in my ability to live a healthy life, to be a long-term weight controller. I also am now confident that when I start my senior year at a new school, I will not only be myself in front of other people, but I will be proud of who I am. Because of that, my friendships with people will be a lot stronger. I will also be able to start back up with my tennis, but this time do it in a healthy way and with a healthy relationship with my coach.

Now, as my departure from this school gets nearer, I have set goals for myself to ensure that I keep up with my program and to help make sure I am successful when I leave. I plan to be mindful of my past ways to make sure I don't slip back into them. I also have to never give up on myself or other long-term weight controllers, which means I must be there for them when they need my help, so they will be there for me when I need them.

I have changed more in these six months than some people do in a lifetime and for that I am eternally grateful. I am finally content with who and what I am.

LAUREN E.
Home: Houston, TX
DOB: 10/25/89

Date Enrolled: 9/5/05
Age: 15
Weight: 266
Height: 5’10

Transition Date: 12/20/05
Age: 16
Weight: 220
Height: 5’10

Lost 46 lbs. in 4 months

Current Weight: 214
Current Height: 5’10

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
52 lbs.

Lauren grew up in Houston as an active child. She was always very big for her age and used her size to excel in sports. She was often ridiculed by other kids. Still, as she became a teenager, she had a close circle of friends and was never depressed about her weight. She was the only child at home and received a lot of positive support from her mother and father.

When her mother raised the possibility of Wellspring , she resisted at first because she didn’t want to leave home. Then, she realized how much her weight interfered with her participation in sports (basketball, softball) and affected the way she looked and her health. She thought it would be hard, but worth it.

Just a few weeks after arriving at Wellspring , Lauren wrote the following:

I lived in Texas my entire life and I love it, except for the humidity. I don’t have any brothers or sisters, but I really wish I did because I think my house would be much more fun that way. There are not enough words in the English dictionary to describe my mom and dad. My mom is the most amazing person in my life. She pretty much holds me together. My dad is so supportive and he encourages me to work hard and to do the best for myself. I love it when he tells me things like, “Man Lauren, you’re going to be such a great lawyer.”

I was twice as heavy and about a foot taller than everyone when I was in kindergarten. In sixth grade, all of the other girls were wearing size 1 and 0. What was I? Size 14 – in middle school! That was hard. I remember going to the stores and my friends were looking at all these clothes and I thought, ‘Oh my God, I can’t fit into this – and I’m not even a teenager yet.’

I was sent to Texas Children’s Wellness Camp around that time. Many kids there were trying to gain weight. They put me on treadmills, measured my heart rate and stuff like that. That’s a lot to handle when you’re 10 and people are really concerned about what you eat. You see different doctors. I was always angry.

My best years were 7th grade through the middle of 9th. They were great because I was close with my friends and I was starting to grow up. It was just so great to kick back and have fun. The end of my 9th grade, though, was hard. I really started to notice my flaws. I noticed my weight, not having a boyfriend, not being able to fit into cool clothes, and not being able to run fast enough on the basketball court. Then, I didn’t even get on the softball team. I realized, ‘Wow, I really need to fix my health just so I can be an all-around better person.’

My life this past year was great and bad in one year, which is somewhat strange. It was great because I learned who my real friends are; this is the best thing. Then, I also realized that my weight was just a huge problem that was keeping me from feeling confident. I guess people’s lives are always complicated.

I ended up at Wellspring and I think it is going to change my life. That is all somebody who is overweight dreams of doing. Wellspring is showing me how to work on my weight and more than that – showing me how to solve my weight issues.

LAWRENCE M.
Home: New York, NY
DOB: 3/18/90

Date Enrolled: 1/30/06
Age: 15
Weight: 286
Height: 6’2

Transition Date: 8/13/06
Age: 16
Weight: 196
Height: 6’2

Lost 90 lbs. in 7 months

Current Weight: 200
Height: 6’2

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
86 lbs.

Lawrence lives on the Upper East Side of Manhattan with three siblings and his parents. Both of his parents are big-time lawyers. According to Lawrence, his father sometimes works 48 hours straight.

Lawrence was diagnosed with multiple allergies at a young age and remembers being restricted from many popular foods to young children, like pizza. His mother reportedly kept a vigilant eye on his intake and oversaw his many vitamins, prescribed by a specialist in Texas.

These restrictions led him to indulge. “I was not allowed many of the same things my friends were and because of that, I found opportunities to sneak foods. It became a comfort to know that my parents didn’t have complete control.”

Lawrence struggled socially and his weight affected his ability to feel comfortable at school. Lawrence was socially isolated and his grades began declining as his weight increased. He also exhibited peculiar behaviors like completing homework, but intentionally not turning it in. Often he felt angry and out of control.

After losing 90 pounds at Wellspring , he discovered that not only did he feel better about himself, but that others responded very differently toward him. “I actually have a life now. My friends will have some reason to remember me besides the fact that I was the quiet kid. I actually make an impact on my school. They are aware of me and they sort of like me, too. There have even (at last) been incidents where I have been flirted with by some girls at parties and such. I didn't get together with any of them and I didn't quite catch the third one's name, but still - it's progress.”

Lawrence is very articulate – it sounds like he speaks in complete paragraphs – and is an excellent writer. The following is something he wrote a few months after arriving at Wellspring :

When I was about 10, I started believing that God was out to get me, and believed that more firmly as time went on. People started chiding me for my poor contributions to sports at school, my grades were constantly in jeopardy, allergies would kick in all the time and cause me to do even worse academically, and I almost never invited my friends over because I preferred reading or watching TV. Because I was gaining weight at the time and we would sometimes play games with "Shirts vs. Skins", my dislike for sports intensified into hatred and shame.

How did I view my future? I didn't, because I didn't like what I saw. I just hoped that something would change. And let my mind wander in the countless thousands of pages and pixel images available to me. I could only be described as distraught.

Then my dog Red died.

Red was the family Norfolk Terrier – my parents had taken care of him as a puppy, my older brother took care of him as a middle aged dog, and I took care of him as an old dog. He was one of the best friends I have ever had.

My school life and social life (or lack thereof) did not suffer unduly, but life at home was different. Beforehand, I had always come home to that lovable face, no matter how many family members were in a bad mood. Coming home to a dad who wasn't actually there until 9 or 10 p.m., a mother who had to be harsh with our homework, an ill-tempered older brother, and an annoying little sister was not my idea of fun.

My teenage years? I guess they really started when I was 12. I met a girl that I had a small crush over, but after 7 years in a private boys' school, I wasn't properly prepared for it. Thankfully, I hardly ever saw her and wouldn't have even known her if my school hadn't been trying to put on a small musical; so I didn't do anything too stupid.

At that time, life at my school had become completely unbearable. I would come home at 6 p.m. from sports every night and collapse from the combined effects of fatigue, exertion, and the emotional drain that arguing with my school, my teachers, and my parents had on me.

I had bought another dog (a pug named Orion) several years earlier. If it hadn't been for him, who knows where I would have ended up?

I changed schools in 9th grade to one that had a far more flexible environment (no coat-and-tie dress code, coed, and optional sports). For a year, I excelled and was happy. I weighed nearly 220 pounds, but I made good friends, got into interesting classes like Directing and Improv, and got to hang out with girls. Unfortunately, at the end of that year, the only girl that I had truly liked left after politely rejecting me for being a cynical jerk. That hurt. Thank God I didn't have to deal with any other peer issues like drugs and alcohol (my closer friends didn't do either and my other friends respected my choices).

The next year, all of my grades declined. Cs in math, Bs in history, Ds in science – and all the while I was gaining weight. I now realize that I could have had As in every class had I applied myself. It's a pity, really. Ah, well.

I also went on Weight Watchers, tried exercising with my mom (I hated that) and even tried going to France for a semester to see if that helped. The result is that I reached my all time high weight – 286 pounds.

So, now I have spent 6 months here at Wellspring . What's changed? My parents don't argue and yell at me anymore; my dad and I talked about our lack of time together and are prepared to change it; my classmates got to see me and were all amazed by my weight loss; and, I no longer see everyone and everything through a pessimistic haze. I feel stronger. I've prioritized and organized my life at bit and I've tested some of my opinions about myself. I was delighted to find that they were wrong.

So the words I use to describe myself now are (bear with me) gravitas, veritas, and Wunjo. They sound weird, but they work better than any English equivalent. Gravitas and veritas are Latin. Veritas means truth and honesty. When I say it describes me, I don't mean that I cannot tell a lie. That's easy. But now I don't lie to myself. I have confronted the dark corners of my mind and have exposed the truths that I feared for so long. I know myself.

Gravitas basically means resilience: your ability to stand firm and face challenges. Before I came here, I would toss my homework and my social life aside. Now I do the work and feel that I could host a party every week (with my more responsible friends, anyway). I have found gravitas: I stand tall against the conflicts within my mind and in my life.

And then there is the Norse rune Wunjo, the Rune of Harmonious Merging. I have seen the part of me that I have hidden and I have seen the full extent of the damaged and dying form of my older self and I have accepted them. Now they work together. And because of that I am a stronger individual than I ever thought possible. And you know what? I like the new me.

I'm Lawrence - and for the first time, there is real hope for me.

TAMARA B.
Home: Kodiak, AK
DOB: 5/3/89

Date Enrolled: 9/5/05
Age: 16
Weight: 293
Height: 5’6

Transition Date: 12/17/05
Age: 16
Weight: 240
Height: 5’6

Lost 53 lbs. in 3 months

Current Weight: 218
Current Height: 5’6

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
75 lbs.

Tamara is a determined young woman who has grown up in Alaska. After an active childhood, the adolescent shift to focus on appearance and socialization began to damage Tamara’s self-esteem. She began to wear boys’ clothes to hide her body and she would put herself down in front of her friends. Tamara thought if she did it first, it would prevent the relentless teasing from others. Tamara was the class clown, but recognized this was a role she played to mask how badly she truly felt about herself as she became heavier and heavier.

Tamara tried group support weight loss programs and she and her mother consulted physicians for medical advice. She lost 20 lbs after eating salads for a month only to regain the weight and further her sense of failure. Her weight gain and low self-esteem, led Tamara to begin engaging in risky behaviors, including substance abuse. Soon she found herself in trouble with the law. Both her father and a supportive counselor saw what was happening and Tamara found herself at Wellspring .

Tamara hit the ground running at Wellspring , relieved to have a chance to change her trajectory. Tamara executed her program nearly flawlessly and lost a dramatic amount of weight in a relatively short period of time. She was able to be herself and discovered her strengths, including a remarkable determination to become a successful long-term weight controller. “Being fat isn’t me,” she said. “I think everyone wants to be happy in the future, but I’m going to make sure it happens for me.”

As Tamara wrote near the end of her time at Wellspring :

My feelings about myself in middle school and elementary school differed. In elementary school I always thought of myself as the top of the class because I got good grades and was very successful. When I hit middle school, I realized that nobody cared about grades. They only thing that people cared about were looks, how many friends you had, popularity, the clothes you wore, and who was going out with whom. This changed my opinion about myself because I had thought of myself as a pretty good person with a lot of self-esteem, until I was shot down by others. I wasn't the confident, outgoing person that I used to be because of the way other people acted towards me.

If I had to pick three words to describe me in middle school, they would have to be: lonely, nerd and annoying. I was lonely because I didn't have very many good friends that I could trust and talk to whenever I needed someone there for me. I was a nerd because I still got good grades, and focused on school work. And lastly, I would say I was annoying because I always bugged other people to try to get them to like and accept me. Even if they didn't think it was annoying, looking back on it, I definitely think I was.

As I've aged into my high school years, I've also been influenced by peer pressure. I wouldn't say that my friends made me do everything, but they definitely helped get me into some trouble. Instead of having supportive friends telling me to stay away from things that could get me in trouble, I had the exact opposite. My friends would try to coax me into doing things with them, saying that no one would find out, or that I wouldn't get in trouble for it. I've come to realize that my friends don't control me, I do, and at the end of the night when I get in trouble for something, it was no one's fault but my own.

Along with aging comes more expectations. I think that I've had certain expectations put on me, such as doing well in school, staying out of trouble, being the responsible person in every situation, being a role model, getting a job and starting to be on your own. Some of these expectations I've fulfilled, others partly, and some I haven't even began to scratch the surface of meeting. I get good grades in school and turn in my homework, which makes me a good student. I try my best to be a good role model for other people to look up to, whether it is in school or just in the general community. This summer I got a job where I worked as a prep cook at a local restaurant for my whole summer. Other expectations, such as staying out of trouble and being the responsible person in situations, are things that I haven't fully been able to do. In the past year, I've done many things I regret, and gotten in trouble for some of them. Now that I'm here at Wellspring and have become more mature, I realized that I can fix my actions much faster, easier and cheaper before I act out on them, as opposed to dealing with the consequences of what I've done.

These last three months have been the best, but worst months of my life. It all started off when I got in trouble with the law at home, which actually turned into one of the best experiences of my life. Little did I know that the stupidest action of my life so far would turn into the opportunity of a lifetime, and the most significant change in my life, which is coming to Wellspring . The judge agreed that if I came here and did well, all charges against me would be dropped.

A majority of my beliefs have been tested during my stay here so far. I used to think really negatively about myself until I met people that are in the same shoes as I am. Before I came here, I would never hear compliments about myself, which changed soon after I arrived. People would tell me all the nice things about me, instead of focusing on the negative things, or things I need to change. This has resulted in a better overall self-image, which will help me go farther in both this program and my life.

Another belief that I came into this program having was that I wasn't worth anything. I thought that because I was bigger than everyone, that also meant I was lower than everyone. I soon realized that wasn't true when I came here. Everyone's in the same boat and we all understand what other people are going through.

The biggest belief about myself that has been tested here is my athletic ability. I was cut from the softball team my freshman year because of my weight, but that wasn't that bad because it pushed me to do my other love, track. In track you have to run for warm ups and do cardio, hence the name track. Being the biggest kid on the team meant that I was the slowest. I didn't believe that I would get better at running, and that I would always be the slow one. When it came time to run the mile here, I finished in the top third of the school, which made me feel good. I've been training a lot on the treadmill and in fitness class doing cardio so when I go home, I won't be the last one anymore. I finally have something to prove and I can't wait to go home and show people the end result.

If I had to choose three words to describe myself at this point in my life, they would have to be: myself, courageous and determined. Before I came to Wellspring , I always felt like I had something to hide with my personality. I didn't want to be known as the loud annoying kid, so I would hide behind what I would call a mask. I would act like things that people said didn't bother me and just brush them off. Since I've been here, I realized that I can be myself and not get made fun of for doing that. People accept me for me, not for being sugarcoated or fake. This is going to make going home easier when it is my time because I don't have to worry about hiding behind something again.

The second word I chose is courageous. I think it's pretty courageous of me, or any student here for that matter, to come to a place completely foreign to them so they can change the rest of their lives. I know that I am here to do one thing and one thing only: lose weight and become a long-term weight controller. I'm not here to meet boys or to break rules; I'm here to make myself a better person. If meeting friends comes on the side, that's great only if it helps me achieve my goals here.

The third word to describe me now would have to be determined. I know that coming into this program I'm going to experience ups and downs, hopefully more ups than downs. But no matter what, I am determined to lose the most weight I can here and make the best of the opportunity I was given. My dad and everyone else put money and time into making me a better person, so I am determined to better myself not only to benefit me, but others around me as well. There are going to be weeks when I get frustrated with things here, but I am going to keep my head high and not let anything get in the way of my goals.

THERESA G.
Home: Agawam, MA
DOB: 11/7/87

Date of Enrollment: 6/6/05
Age: 17
Weight: 205
Height: 5’3

Transition Date: 10/31/05
Age: 17
Weight: 153
Height: 5’3

Lost 52 lbs. in 5 months

Current Weight: 154
Current Height: 5’3

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
51 lbs.

Theresa grew up in suburban Massachusetts with an older brother and sister. Although her parents divorced when she was quite young, she had a happy childhood.

As she began gaining weight in her teenage years, she tried a few diets, but none worked for her. She had an active social life and wasn’t particularly depressed. Her main concern about her weight was the decline in her athletic skills that resulted from the additional weight. Theresa had already graduated from high school by the time she enrolled at Wellspring .

Since returning home, Theresa reports that “My life has been insanely different. My social life is so awesome. I’m working at two jobs that I like. I just love the people at these jobs. I’m definitely more secure with myself and just taking things in perspective. I’m tired, but I’m happy.”

Midway through her time at Wellspring , Theresa expressed her thoughts on her journey:

I have come a long way and I still have such a long way to go.

My weight didn’t really ever affect me socially. I was picked on once, but that was it. But I do know that I had gone through a lot of best friends and I have a feeling that I’ve never really wanted anyone to get too close. And I used to pick fights with everybody. Maybe part of that was that all of my friends are super skinny. I was frustrated with that, thinking ‘Why can’t I be like that?’

I never had boyfriends, ever. I was so insecure about myself, but not realizing it. I never realized how negatively I felt about myself until I came to Wellspring . In fact, I never even admitted to myself that I had a weight problem. That made it a very large step for me to come to Wellspring three months ago.

Before I got to Wellspring I thought, ‘I’m overweight and that’s it.’ It’s so easy to be overweight and so easy just to say, ‘Whatever.’ It’s so easy to give up. I had surgery to remove a cyst during my sophomore year of high school and they told me that I didn’t have to do gym. I was so happy to get out of gym and I’m sure that year I gained a lot of weight. I did nothing all year because I didn’t have to.

I played tennis and basketball during the year before that surgery. Toward the end of my freshman year I realized that I couldn’t play basketball as well as I used to. I was a point guard and then they started playing me as a center and just for defense. That was kind of a blow to my ego. I love basketball and I was so frustrated that I couldn’t play it as well or as much as I used to. When that doctor gave me an excuse to quit, I took it rather than face my weight problem and do something about it.

Now that I can face this problem head on I feel much stronger. I have admitted to a huge problem in my life and I am taking it on. I am also strong because I can push myself to do something about which I had no motivation to change just a short time ago. I also feel confused about being in this completely new world (Wellspring ), but I’m also fine with being here. And I am very happy to be finally losing weight in a healthy way. I’m also comfortable with the people here at Wellspring . In the past three months since I got here I have grown so much. So many things have changed for me that I can’t wait to see how it all goes.

JARRETT F.
Home: St. Charles, IL
DOB: 2/12/92

Date of Enrollment: 9/6/04
Age: 12
Weight: 225
Height: 5’3

Transition Date: 6/2/05
Age: 13
Weight: 136 lbs
Height: 5’6

Lost 89 lbs. in 9 months

Current Weight: 180
Current Height: 5’9

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
80 lbs.

Jarrett was a fast, active child until the age of 6 when he began to gain weight. As other kids began to make fun of him, he adapted by becoming the “funny fat kid.” He also coped by eating large quantities to deal with the hurts of his weight, teasing, and when he lost a close family member.

As he grew up, Jarrett made several attempts to lose weight, including the use of medications and resorting to bulimic behaviors. Always the funny guy, one time he entertained his parents by putting a broom handle between the refrigerator doors. He would lose a few pounds and then gain it back, plus some.

Soon, the funny behavior became less funny and more for the sole purpose of attracting attention. Jarrett would experience nose bleeds in class, primarily self-inflicted. In time, these behaviors were exacerbated to the point that Jarrett had few friends.

With the support of his parents and a counselor at school, Jarrett made the decision to attend Wellspring at the age of 12, about 100 lbs. overweight. As he began to lose weight, Jarrett came to recognize his self-destructive behaviors and began to change his ways.

Jarrett lost almost 100 lbs during his time at Wellspring and with the help of his behavioral coaches, learned how to take control over his own life. He developed healthy coping mechanisms to deal with stress in his life. He also learned to cope with lonely and sad feelings through talking to others, sitting with a pet, mediating, and exercising. In his time at Wellspring , Jarrett became quite a good athlete.

JILL R.
Home: Fitchburg, MA
DOB: 6/3/91

Date of Enrollment: 9/4/05
Age: 14
Weight: 227
Height: 5’5

Transition Date: 6/2/06
Age: 15
Weight: 151
Height: 5’5

Lost 76 lbs. in 9 months

Current Weight: 150
Current Height: 5’5

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
80 lbs.

Jill remembers being overweight since pre-school. Her weight began to affect her very early on, and she started dieting. Nothing seemed to work and her weight continued to increase. This was worsened as she ate to deal with the feelings she experienced as her body was changing and she felt pressure from family, doctors and peers. But her weight was something she simply felt she could not control.

Starting in 7th grade, a series of unhealthy decisions and friends led to depression, which led to 230 lbs. Jill reached a point where she felt Wellspring was her “last chance.”

When Jill first arrived at Wellspring , she continued to feel helpless for a period of time. An illness caused her to return home for nearly 2 months. When she returned to Wellspring in January of 2006, Jill was ready to take control of her life.

One key part of Jill’s success was the passion she developed for running. While running was painful initially, soon it became a healthy coping skill. Jill cut 3 minutes off her timed mile and increased her endurance. In the fall of 2006, Jill was the youngest runner to complete a local half marathon.

Jill is a young woman who was desperate to gain control over her body and her life and found health and joy in the process.

Here is what Jill wrote to her fellow alumni six months after returning home:

My worst memory was the beginning of last year. In the beginning of the year I got involved in a lot of things that weren’t necessary to my life and I started to make the wrong choices with people I hung out with and the things I was doing. I ended up in some situations that really impacted my life and I was lifeless. I got suspended from my Catholic School and I became really immature. I was really depressed for a while and didn’t really know what to do with myself but eat my feelings away. I became really paranoid all the time and I hardly wanted to go anywhere and I never understood why this had to happen to me. From time to time I learned that everything happens for a reason, but it still felt like a thousand pounds of weight were on my shoulders. I got scared all the time of getting hurt, too, emotionally and physically. I’ve matured a lot from the situation and I watch out for myself and make better decisions. I’m still learning how to deal with it all because it was overwhelming to think about.

Weight has pretty much always been an issue in my life. I was pretty active, but I ate really unhealthy. My weight started to become a major issue in the 7th grade after my problems earlier in the year. I never really noticed how big I actually got until this past summer. One day I looked in the mirror and I realized I really need to do something about it. It had pretty much taken over my life completely. I was also treated a lot differently from my family and friends. When my mom started to notice that I was packing on around 230 pounds, she got scared and so did I. I disappointed myself that I let it go that much and I knew I needed to do something about it. I had become extremely unhealthy emotionally and physically.

Now, I look back and realize that a year ago I weighed 230 pounds. I was in denial about the weight, depressed, hopeless and couldn’t run as much as a couple of feet. Six months later, leaving Wellspring , I weigh 80 pounds less. I joined my school’s cross-country team, which I love.

Yesterday, I ran the Bay State ½ Marathon and finished 792 out of 2,000. The first thought that popped into my head was – Wellspring . Wellspring truly saved my life. I couldn’t be more thankful. My fellow students are such inspirations to me. I hope none of them gives up, ever.

JAMIE H.
Home: Naples, FL
DOB: 10/7/89

Date of Enrollment: 10/17/05
Age: 16
Weight: 240
Height: 5’11

Transition Date: 6/2/06
Age: 16
Weight: 165
Height: 5’11

Lost 75 lbs. in 8 months

Current Weight: 175
Current Height: 5’11

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
65 lbs.

Jamie first noticed that her weight was a problem when she was 6. Other kids began to ignore her, or make rude comments, or spread rumors about her size. She tried several diets, including organized support programs, pills, and even a special soup. Jamie acknowledged that her weight was a problem, but after many failed attempts had difficulty believing anything would work and became apathetic toward her weight and life in general.

Jamie demonstrated classical adolescent magical thinking in hoping that she would “end up fine” and not work at it.

After a few weeks at Wellspring , Jamie realized she was wrong. From that point on, Jamie was extremely diligent about the program. The hardest part was activity, which got easier as she began losing a substantial amount of weight and moving was not as uncomfortable. Jamie enjoyed sports and joined the soccer team. “I just ran around with sweat dripping down my face. My cheeks were red. I realized, ‘Hey, I’m playing in a game.’ So I ran and shot the goal.”

Jamie definitely missed her friends and family while she was here. But she recognizes that she not only became healthier at Wellspring , she also grew as a person.

Three months after arriving at Wellspring , Jamie wrote about her experience:

I was a sweet little girl. Adopted at the age of 1 by my loving parents into an awesome family, I was always getting in trouble. But, when confronted, I instantly confessed. I experienced life in a happy way in a peaceful home with lots of love. I was never once disrespected as a kid. I lived in peace.

In elementary school, I was a very quiet child, due to many rude comments about my weight. I started to get overweight when I was in kindergarten and never really got it under control. I always thought I was fine. I figured everyone else was wrong with what they said about me and my weight. I tried my best to ignore it. I always thought I would grow up to be really tall and popular and skinny and beautiful.

When I hit middle school, the way I thought changed. I figured I’d keep to myself yet again and eventually my body would become normal. I did get taller like I thought I would, but I also gained weight.

I know now that my thoughts about myself were way wrong. I remember thinking that I would always end up fine and I never had to work at it. I figured ehh… I’m fine being fat… what’s the big deal? But coming to Wellspring , I realized I was so wrong. I do have to work hard to get to my goals and can’t sit back and expect it to happen.

In high school, I broke out of my shell a lot! I made so many friends and went out and did things I never did before. Yes, I was obese, but I was living a fabulous life with friends who loved me. They were friends with me for who I was, not what I looked like.

In the last three months, the most significant change has probably been coming to Wellspring . I have lost 45 plus pounds and plan to lose about 35 more. I haven’t had very many beliefs tested at Wellspring , but the belief that I would just lose weight magically was blown out the window (shocker). I believe that I have grown a lot in the last 3 months also and I think Wellspring had helped a lot.

COURTNEY D.
Home: Norwich, VT
DOB: 11/11/88

Date of Enrollment: 3/5/06
Age: 17
Weight: 225
Height: 5’3

Transition Date: 8/2/06
Age: 17
Weight: 171
Height: 5’3

Lost 54 lbs. in 5 months

Current Weight: 177
Current Height: 5’3

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
48 lbs.

Courtney was 7 when she noticed she had a weight problem – she was bigger than all her friends. She also noticed that when she ate the same things as her friends, she would gain weight, but they would stay the same.

Her weight affected her socially, due in part to teasing, but also because Courtney began to isolate herself. She lost motivation to hang out with her friends when she could not shop at the same stores and was embarrassed about not fitting into the same clothes.

As her friends began to date, Courtney felt no one would be interested in her. Soon, she stopped taking care of herself, which included not showering, wearing “crappy” clothes, and eating to cope with her feelings of loneliness and frustration.

Courtney did try to lose weight by using several programs and even restricting eating for long periods of time. None of these worked; she would consistently gain the weight back and remained depressed and angry. Courtney was relieved when she found Wellspring , but it took over a year for her to convince her mom to let her attend.

Courtney started off with a month-long outdoor experience before finally making it into the dorm. She never looked back and succeeded brilliantly at the program.

She admits it was hard. But by taking it one day at a time, she has been successful. “Sometimes I feel like I’m never going to get through this and I’m going to gain all my weight back. Then I just try to work on that one day and get through it.”

JOSH S.
Home: Tucson, AZ
DOB: 5/18/90

Date of Enrollment: 8/8/05
Age: 15
Weight: 227
Height: 71

Transition Date: 12/23/05
Age: 15
Weight: 165
Height: 72

Lost 62 lbs. in 5 months

Current Weight: 175
Current Height: 72

Total weight loss (BMI-adjusted):
57 lbs.

Josh is an intelligent and creative young man. His weight problem started in elementary school when he struggled with going back and forth between his mother and father’s homes. Josh expressed anger and frustration by underperforming in school and overeating to show his parents the pain he felt. He also struggled to cope with his father’s substance abuse. Josh tried several diet programs recommended and enforced by his parents, which fueled the anger and frustration, especially when they didn’t work.

After a painful experience at military school where he gained more weight, Josh arrived at Wellspring . While he was initially resistant to the idea, once he arrived, he dived right in once he discovered it really did help him lose weight. He was relieved that he was able to make his own choices at meals.

At Wellspring , Josh developed a love for activity and low-fat food. The boy who used to think he was too intellectual and overweight to participate in sports became an avid athlete and enjoyed the way low-fat food and exercise made him feel.

Through controlling his weight, Josh experienced success in areas where he had previously perceived himself as a failure. He was very well-liked, he lost weight and he did well in school. In one of his assignments at Wellspring , Josh talked about what it was like to be a role model, a far cry from the overweight and angry teenager he was prior to experiencing this success. “The best thing is I feel like a role model. That boosts my self-esteem to the stratosphere.”

Here is what Josh wrote three months after arriving at Wellspring :

“Josh, where’s your homework?” I look at my teacher with a glint of satisfaction in my eye, “At home, I guess.” As I got home after school, I look at the door to my dad’s room, still locked. I run into my room and look for something to take my pain away. I want to cut, no… I’m too afraid to ever do that. I want to kill myself, but I know life’s too worth it to waste. But in this search for a final redemption all I can do is cry myself to sleep.

This was me two years ago. A highly depressed and Attention Deficit Disorder inflicted 13-year-old. A few days after this I found out that the reason my Dad was always locked in his room was a severe drug problem. I had nowhere to run and no one to talk to except a few friends who couldn’t understand me. (Well, they could have if I would have let them.) I was so afraid to even talk to him. You see, I’ve never been assertive with my father. When I talked to him, I cried. Maybe it’s because he hurt me so much and I fear him, but it still affects me even today. There was only one way to even make the pain lessen just a little bit: get back at Dad. There were only two things that my Dad cared about in my life at the time: grades and health. I hadn’t turned in my homework for two weeks now; it was only eighth grade, it wouldn’t count towards college. I had eaten so badly I felt atrocious. But I couldn’t wait for him to see me failing and fat, so he could feel as I felt: the horrid despair. I hold the anger deep in the depths of my brain to this day, the darkness no one sees.

I don’t know what caused my Dad to start. From when I was born to middle school there were no real symptoms. I led a pretty normal life except my parents got divorced when I was 5. It didn’t really ever have the effect it was supposed to have on me. I just went on with life as usual. I was never the fat kid, just weird. I think it was because my Dad was always traveling and I only saw Mom on weekends. So I had to find ways to amuse myself when I was alone, like conspiracy theories and stuff. When I moved to Arizona I could only see my Mom on holidays. I think that may have been why I felt so trapped, but I went on with life. And after a few normal years and a few bad teachers, my pain started simply by thinking my Dad locked himself in his room “sick”.

My mom moved to Arizona from New York at this time, so I finally had a place of solace from my dad. It was trials of pain and suffering during the week, wondering if I’d come home to a dead father. But on the weekends I was with my mom, happy and carefree. One day I saw my mother help my sister when she fell on the rocks outside. My Dad was at rock bottom on the floor, near death; I needed to help him. I finally realized that I needed to help my dad, not hurt him. I needed my life back and I knew where to start. So I started turning in homework and getting better grades. But eating-wise, I was a failure. I realized that, just as my Dad had done with drugs, I had become addicted to food. I tried fad diets, exercise, all for failure. I wondered if I’d ever be normal again. Everyone made me feel like it was my fault. Friends stopped talking to me for odd reasons they never explained and my life crumbled from mistakes I made. Again, I felt this suicidal despair except this time it was my fault.

For my ninth grade year my Dad finally went into rehab as we found him high in a remote motel room. I also went to a military school. I thought I could get back into shape while my Dad got clean. I was gravely mistaken because they had three buffet style meals a day at that school. I was doing the play for my school so I could skip PT (physical training). It was great. I gained another thirty pounds and was at my highest weight ever. My Dad got out of rehab at the end of that year and I was still fat. I was distraught. My Dad had succeeded where I had failed. I felt so weak, but it just made me gain more weight. I felt I was stronger than Dad, but he was doing so much better and I was doing so much worse. My Dad finally realized he needed to help me through all of this pain. And during this time I realized he was much like me in ways I never thought. He wanted to help me, not